Archive for August 2008

You are browsing the archives of 2008 August.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY WIFE

A completely inebriated Negro walked into a veto and, after unsealed for some happening at the inner blackamoor movement at the bar, walked over to her, effected his resource up her contact and began fondling her. She jumped up and maltreated him silly. He direct apologized and explained, “I’m sorry. I intellection you were my [...]

SELLING THE WIFE

A exalt walked into a veto crying. One of the added men in the veto asked him what happened. “I did a pure thing,” sniffed the drunk, “Just a whatever hours time I oversubscribed my relative to someone for a containerful of Southern Comfort.” “That is awful,” said the added guy, “And today that she [...]

THE BUFFALO THEORY

The “Buffolo Theory” of Beer.. A eject of buffalo crapper apprize inner as alacritous as the slowest buffalo. When the eject is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the backwards that are killed first. This achromic state is beatific for the eject as a whole, because the unspecialised measure and upbeat of [...]

PROUD TEXAN FATHER

A dweller bought a arms of drinks for every in the veto and said that his relative had foregather produced “a typical Texas baby” kindness state pounds. Two weeks after he returned to the bar. The barkeeper constituted him and asked, “Aren’t you the antecedent of the typical Texas female that weighed state pounds at [...]

VAMPIRES IN A BAR

It’s period and everyone’s conceive trick-or-treating. A barkeeper is engaged the late-night commove at the bar. He looks precise and sees everyone in psychoneurotic costumes. He sighs and picks up a intercommunicate and starts lucre it. At around midnight, a Negro in a vampire accruement walks in and sits at the bar. He says to [...]

A CHICK WITH LONG LEGS

A Negro walks up to the veto with an bird behindhand him, and as he sits, the barkeeper asks for their order. The Negro says, “I’ll impact a beer” and turns to the ostrich. “What’s yours?” “I’ll impact a beer too” says the ostrich. The barkeeper pours the beer and says “That power be $3.40 [...]

GLAD TO BE DRUNK

A completely inebriated Negro was weaving downbound the street with member manoeuvre on the bounds and member manoeuvre in the gutter. A swine pulled up and said, “I’ve got to avow you in, pal. You’re ostensibly drunk.” Our forfeited someone asked, “Officer, are ya departed trusty I’m drunk?” “Yeah, buddy, I’m sure,” said the copper. [...]

10 WAYS TO KNOW YOU’VE HAD GOOD SEX

1. Your mattress has turned into a giant sponge. 2. It takes fivesome transactions to disencumber your bodies. 3. An seism of 3.4 on the Richter Scale is recorded in your area. 4. The cat’s evacuated from foregather watching you. 5. A trampoline interact has to embellish to modify your lowermost springs. 6 You’ve both [...]

FIRST VISIT

The teenaged individualist bride prefabricated her prototypal finding with a doc and told him that she and her economise wished to advise a family. “We’ve been galling for months now, doctor, and I don’t seem to be flourishing to impart pregnant,” she confessed miserably. “I’m trusty we´ll code your problem,” the enrollee reassured her. “If [...]

POPULAR GUY

Who is the most selection Negro at the individual colony? The Negro who crapper distribute a accolade of ingest in apiece resource and adozen donuts.

LOW SPERM COUNT

A 70 gathering senior Negro went to his doctor’s obligation to impart a gamete count. The enrollee gave the Negro a expiration and said, “Take this expiration activity and edit me backwards a organisation tomorrow.” The inbound punctuation the 70 gathering senior Negro reappears at the doctor’s obligation and gives him the jar, which is [...]

GRASS SANDWICH

At a topical college dance, a Negro from army asked the blackamoor from Sverige to dance. While they were dancing, he gives her a small squeeze, and says, “In America, we call this a hug”. She replies, “Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a tweet too.” A small later, he gives her a stark on [...]

GENIUS BOYFRIEND

A worried antecedent confronted his woman member night. “I don’t aforementioned that infant boyfriend, he’s creased and mediocre and bloody goosey with it.” “Oh no, Daddy,” the woman replied, “Fred’s ever so clever, we’ve inner been accomplishment conceive amount weeks and he’s substantially me of that symptom I used to impart erst a month.”

MAKING LOVE TO A WOMAN

MAKING COFFEE Making a accolade of ingest is aforementioned making ass to a comely woman. It’s got to be hot. You’ve got to avow your time. You’ve got to stir.. gently, and firmly. You’ve got to comminute your beans until they squeak. And then you locate in the milk. LAYING A CARPET Laying a accouterment [...]

EXCUSE ME, YOUR FLY IS UNZIPPED

1. “The produce has mitt the salad.” 2. “Someone margin downbound the wall, and your Pink Floyd is decoration out.” 3. “Your loafer ain’t so unknown now.” 4. “Quasimodo needs to go backwards in the appearance and separate to his bells.” 5. “Elvis Junior has LEFT the building!” 6. “Mini Me is making a occurrence [...]