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Medical experts from London have published a paper that concludes that Seder participants should not eat both chopped liver and choroses. Their research shows that if they do, it can lead to Charoses of the Liver. New cheese factory. Did you hear about the new facility Kraft Foods is building in Israel? It’s called “Cheeses [...]

Angela was nearing 60 and was in her final year of teaching. She was a devout Christian who missed teaching from the Bible. Because she was worried at how little her class knew about religion, Angela decided she was going to disregard the new regulations and teach some religion. She told her class that she [...]

1. Your PC would shut down automatically on Friday evenings. 2. Your “Start” button would be replaced with a “Let’s go. I’m not getting any younger.” button. 3. RETRY would be replaced with “You vant I should try again?” 4. When disconnecting external devices from your PC, instructions would say “Remove from your PC’s tuchis [...]

AFIKOMMENTS n. Adult arguing that occurs as children search for hidden Passover matzo. BAGELA n. A gay Jewish baker. BIALY ACHE n. The result of lunch at your mother’s and dinner at your mother-in-law’s. BLINTZKRIEG n. A late-night assault on the refrigerator in search of leftovers even though “I won’t be able to eat for [...]

Martin Lewis converts and becomes a priest. He give his first Mass in front of a number of high ranking priests who came for the occasion. At the end of the new priest’s sermon, a cardinal goes up to congratulate him. “Pastor Lewis,” he said, “That was very well done, you were just perfect. But [...]

Rabbi Rabinovitz  answers his phone. “Hello?” “Hello, is this Rabbi Rabinovitz?” “It is.” “This is the Inland Revenue. Can you help us?” “I’ll try.” “Do you know Sam Cohen?” “I do.” “Is he a member of your congregation?” “He is.” “Did he donate £10,000 to the synagogue rebuilding fund last year?” “He will!”

Sidney telephones Rabbi Levy. He says, “Rabbi, I know tonight is Kol Nidre night, but tonight Spurs are in the European Cup quarter finals. Rabbi, I’m a life long Spurs fan. I’ve got to watch the Spurs game on TV.” Rabbi Levy replies, “Sidney, that’s what video recorders are for.” Sidney is surprised. “You mean [...]