Thrown out of the Laboratory
10 ways to get thrown out from chemistry lab
1. Begin pronouncing everything your immigrant lab instructor says exactly the way he/she says it.
2. Give a cup of liquid nitrogen to a classmate and ask, “Does this taste funny to you?”
3. Mutter repeatedly, “Not again… not again… not again.”
4. Pretend an electron got stuck in your ear, and insist on describing the sound to others.
5. Pop a paper bag at the crucial moment when the professor is about to pour the sulfuric acid
6. When it’s very quiet, suddenly cry out, “My eyes!”
7. Deny the existence of chemicals.
8. Casually walk to the front of the room and urinate in a beaker.
9. Consistently write three atoms of potassium as “KKK.”
10. Show up with a 55-gallon drum of fertilizer and express an interest in federal buildings
